Top 10 Things Samuel L. Jackson Might Say When He Plays a Jedi Master in the Upcoming Star Wars Movie:

10.  "You don't need to see my goddamn identification, 'cause these ain't the motherfuckin' droids you're lookin' for."

 9.  "Well, womp rat may taste like pumpkin pie, but I would never know, 'cause I wouldn't eat the filthy motherfucker."

 8.  "This is your father's lightsaber.  When you absolutely, positively have to kill every motherfuckin' stormtrooper in the room, accept no substitutes."

 7.  "If Obi-Wan's ass ain't home I don't know what the fuck we're gonna do, 'cause I ain't got no other partners on Tatooine."

 6.  "Feel the force, motherfucker."

 5.  "You sendin' the Fett?  Sheeeyit, Hutt, that's all you had to say."

 4.  "Yeah, Chewie Rocky Horror has a hair problem.  What's the brother gonna do: he's a Wookie."

 3.  "Does Jabba the Hutt look like a bitch?

 2.  "‘What' ain't no planet I ever heard of.  They speak Bocce on What?"

 1. " Hand me my lightsaber.  It's the one that says ‘Bad Mother Fucker' on it."
Back to TV and Movies

Back to Tina's Humor Archives main page